


Riddles In The Dark

by DashFlintceschi



Series: Mythological Creatures Alphabet Challenge [18]
Category: Bring Me The Horizon, You Me At Six
Genre: Dan's a Sphinx, Gen, He's guarding Josh, Riddles, things go a bit wrong
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-11
Updated: 2016-03-11
Packaged: 2018-05-26 03:11:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6221239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DashFlintceschi/pseuds/DashFlintceschi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan's a Sphinx who's chosen to 'guard' Josh. Oli makes a joke he maybe shouldn't have.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Riddles In The Dark

**Author's Note:**

> S is for Sphinx. This took far too long, because there are surprisingly few mythical creatures that start with an S. I've also taken massive creative liberties with this one, but when don't I, to be fair. Title is taken from the fifth chapter of The Hobbit.

Max groans as he rushes through the tour bus and finds Dan blocking his path.

“Please, mate, not right now, I’m about to piss myself,” he pleads, but Dan just shrugs apologetically. See, Dan’s always had this odd quirk. He can’t let anyone pass him without making them answer a riddle. He tries, he really does, but until he’s asked a riddle, and they’ve given him the answer, it feels as though his feet are glued to the floor. At times like this, he does his best to ask super easy ones.

“What do you have when sitting, that you don’t have while standing?” He asks, hoping Max doesn’t hate him too much.

“I don’t fucking know, just let me by,” he demands, and Dan tries, he really does, but he can’t and they both know it. Matt and Chris come up behind Max, looking sympathetic.

“Can’t figure out his riddle?” Chris asks knowingly, and Max nods. “Right, let’s hear it, then,” he requests, and Dan repeats it for them.

“Please hurry up, I think I’m genuinely going to piss myself,” Max whimpers, and they both think as hard as they can; they’ve been in his situation more times than they’d like to admit.

They can’t think of it, though, and Matt’s considering finding a bottle for Max, when he looks over Dan’s shoulder and sighs in relief as he sees Josh. For some reason, Dan can easily let Josh pass him whenever he likes. He can also let anyone who’s with him past, too. 

Josh immediately figures out what’s going on, and squeezes Dan’s elbow.

“Can I get past, mate?” He asks lightly, and Dan immediately moves, unable to stop himself instantly moving to block the way again. It doesn’t matter, though, because Josh grabs Max’s arm and turns back around. “Sorry, love, once more?” He grins, and Dan returns his grin as he moves, letting Josh pull Max past him so Max can run into the toilet, almost crying with relief seconds later. “So, what was it, anyway?” He asks, knowing Dan tries to think of easy ones during these situations. Dan repeats the riddle, and Josh snorts as Max comes out of the toilet. “Oh, come on. It’s obviously a lap,” he tells them, and understanding dawns on their faces as Dan nods.

Dan knows why he does these things, but he doesn’t think they’d take it very well if he explained that he’s a Sphinx and each Sphinx has one thing they instinctively choose to guard, which they guard for the rest of their lives, and Dan instinctively chose Josh. Yeah, somehow, he’s pretty sure that ‘sorry I almost made you piss yourself, but the unreasonable part of my brain decided to make me Josh’s bodyguard’ wouldn’t go down well at all.

The decision is taken out of Dan’s hands a week later when they’re in Sheffield. They’re spending their night off with the Bring Me The Horizon guys; and Tom, of course. They think Dan’s ‘quirk’ is brilliant and often purposely put themselves into Dan’s path so he’ll give them a riddle.

Tom has just done this, and been given a good one, when it happens.

“A man walks into a bar and asks for a glass of water. The bartender pulls out a shotgun and points it at him. The man says, thank you and leaves. Why?” Most of Dan’s attention is on Tom, but as always, a good chunk of it is on Josh, who’s sitting somewhere behind him with the others.

Tom’s pondering his answer when his brother’s voice floats over.

“I’m gonna fuckin’ belt you one for that, Franceschi!” He’s laughing as he says it, clearly joking, but Dan can’t help it as his instincts kick in, spinning around as his fangs and talons force their way out. The laughter quickly turns to shocked silence as he makes short work of the distance between himself and Oli. He lifts his hand, fingers curled and locked in position for what can only be a lethal blow, when Josh acts without thinking, jumping up and rushing to stand between them. Dan instantly freezes, talons retreating back into his skin.

As soon as Dan’s talons and fangs are gone, Josh does the first thing that comes to mind, which, ironically, is to belt him one. He punches him as hard as he can, and Dan takes it without complaint. He knows he deserves it.

“What the fuck was that?!” Josh snarls, and Dan sighs sadly. He’s ninety percent sure none of them will stick around after he tells them. He knows he has no choice, though, so he sits down and explains everything, making absolutely sure that they know that his almost attack on Oli was an instinct he couldn’t stop, and that he really did try to stop it.

When he’s done, he looks at the floor, waiting for their reactions.

“I thought Sphinxes were lions with people heads?” Nicholls asks and Dan laughs softly.

“Yeah, pretty sure whoever came up with that one was smoking the good shit,” he tells him, and most of them snort.

“To be fair, the reality seems to be about as weird, anyway,” Jordan comments, and Dan can’t help but sneak a glance at Josh, desperate to know how he’s taking it. He looks a bit confused, but he doesn’t seem to hate him, so there’s that, at least.

“Why me, though?” Josh finally asks, and Dan shrugs.

“Not a clue. It’s an instinct thing. For some of us, it’s treasure; some choose books; and some of us choose people. Most of us never figure out why we choose the person we do,” he explains, and Josh nods, happy with his reasoning.

Dan’s just starting to let himself believe that they’re ok with it, when Tom pipes up.

“Oh, I’ve got it! The guy had the hiccups!” And that’s when Dan knows things are fine.


End file.
